Monday, December 12, 2011

Because I bet you're dying to know what I think of popular literature

Books. I spend a lot of time reading. I don't know why I like it so much, I just do. Right now I'm reading this book called outliers by Malcolm Gladwell which I can't talk about yet because Jessica and I are reading it together and we are supposed to discuss it on the Internet later. Spoiler alert: I hate it.
What do you guys think of when you hear the name Malcolm? I think of Malcolm Jamal Warner and then I think of Malcolm X. I've read the autobiography of Malcolm X at least four times but I still think of Theo Huxtable first. Isn't that fucked up?
Anyway. I'm going to read the hunger games next. I always have to read everything everybody else is reading because I'm obsessed with pop culture. So like twilight and the girl with the dragon tattoo. Twilight, oh my god, what a fucking creepy book. Spoiler alert. The werewolf falls in love with a baby at the end, but that's ok you guys, because he's not going to fuck her right away. I don't think i even need to add anything to that, but if you want more reasons why i thought this series was terrible, it's supposed to be this great love story between the human and the vampire but I read the whole fucking series and at the end of it I still had no idea what either one of those boring motherfuckers liked about the other one. I sort of can't believe that the twilight series is not about a teenage girl in an abusive relationship that has built a fantasy world in her head in order to deal with her shitty reality. That's what it's really about, right? No? I'm supposed to take it literally? Fuck.
The girl with the dragon tattoo. Oh my god, y'all. The first 100 pages is about banks or something. This must have held the average persons attention as everybody in the free world has read it which, how is that even possible, it didn't hold mine at all and the instructions on the back of a shampoo bottle can hold my attention. I kept reading it anyway because I hate myself. The main character is this emaciated little biker chick who is a total badass genius hacker or whatever, but then SPOILER ALERT IF YOU HAVEN'T READ THE 2ND BOOK IN THE SERIES she gets breast implants. It makes no sense for the character and I don't recall it forwarding the plot in any way. It also makes no sense how much they talk about Ikea in this book.
So now I'm prepared to read and hate hunger games. Although maybe I'll like it, I liked Harry Potter so you never know. Also as I was typing this my brother texted me to ask what I want for my birthday and I said 1Q84 by Murakami, because I need to make sure I still know how to love the written word after reading all of these horrendous books.
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