Wednesday, July 13, 2011

I love technology

Did you know I do all my blogging from my iPhone? I do all my blogging from my iPhone. I do all of my Internet fucking around on my iPhone, I don't even know why I have the Internet at home. Oh wait yes I do, it's so I can watch netflix on it. I watch tv on the Internet and play on the Internet on my phone, THIS IS THE FUTURE AND IT'S INCREDIBLE! You know what is not incredible, the fact that I can't even talk on the phone on my phone. FUCK YOU APPLE. I just spent ten minutes trying to talk to Sabrina and ultimately failed and now she's sending me a short story to read, in leiu of talking to each other. It's like this is a conspiracy to make me even more reclusive than I already am. Why is apple conspiring against me??? There's the real short story, the story where Apple achieves it's end goal of world domination by manipulating us through our fucking phones and shit. I like how all of the people who only signed on with AT&T when the iPhone came out think AT&T is super shitty. NOPE! Back in the fucking olden days my PINK RAZR worked SUPERBLY! NOPE, AT&T doesn't suck, it's your rad iPhone that you think is so cool that sucks. I'm sorry you had to find out this way.
I am going to call AT&T tomorrow and ask them what they are going to do to rectify the fact that I pay $200 a month for some phones I can't talk on. And that keeps eating my blog posts. I wrote a whole fucking manifesto about the mall. WHERE IS IT, IPHONE? WHERE?
It is like I'm gollum from lord of the rings and this fucking phone is my precious. I didn't even know I fucking needed it until I got it, and now I I can't function without it and it's ruining my life. And Apple is Sauron or whatever. Fucking up all my shit. God damn, I just scared the shit put of myself with that analogy. Peace out, my nerds.
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