Wednesday, June 29, 2011

Happy Anniversary to Me

Three years ago right now it was my wedding day and I was so hungover I thought I could die because I got so drunk the night before that I puked in a trashcan. I have an awesome picture of all of my friends in front of the bar that night and we look like the fucking brat pack or something. My dad had a tab at the bar so we could all drink and for some reason my friends kept paying for drinks anyway.
Then I got married. It was awesome. My brother performed the ceremony and it was really short which I'm sure was awesome for all the people I invited. That was my main concern during wedding planning, will my friends leave this wedding hating me? Thats why I had an open bar and expensive food but let my friends dj instead of paying one. I also didn't throw a bouquet, cut a cake, or have a first dance. Nobody is interested in watching another person do any of that shit. I mean, I did have a first dance but didn't announce it so nobody got to watch me have my first dance to the Aphex Twin remix of Phillip Glass's version of We Could be Heroes by David Bowie.
Mandy was at my wedding and she wore a dress and got wasted. Then she moved to Austin so she could wear dresses and get wasted all the time. Sabrina was at my wedding also and kept calling the front desk at the hotel and telling them "look, the bride is being a fucking cunt and she keeps screaming about bathrobes and pineapples, can you make this happen for her before she drives us all insane?" So they kept bringing us awesome shit all weekend. I have pictures of Sabrina laying on top of the bar at my wedding. Jessica was also there. It was like a 2006 blog reunion. If I got married today I would ask Jessica to be in my wedding. If I had gotten married in 2006 I would have asked Jessica to be in my wedding. I guess we weren't that good of friends in 2008. I hope we're never not that good of friends again. I don't know why I didn ask Sabrina to be my maid of honor. Probably because Sabrina is too cool to ever be anything with the word maid in the title. I should have asked her to be my head bitch in charge. All of my friends were there and that is why it was awesome. Dave was also there and one of my friends took a video in which he drunkenly professes that I am more awesome than my husband, which was rad because before that we used to regularly argue about which one of us Dave liked more. I'm so glad I'm still friends with these people. Happy anniversary to me and my husband and all my friends because we all still like each other three years later.
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