Tuesday, January 27, 2009


today i was talking to dave at work and i got a text from mandy that john updike died. my first thought was, who cares, because caring when somebody you don't know dies is stupid. i learned that at a young age when kurt cobain died and every loser i went to school with wore black. STOP CRYING ABOUT KURT COBAIN, YOU ARE 12 YEARS OLD. but then i thought more about john updike and i realized that he is one of the only writers i like that is still writing books, like all the time, which even if not every one of them is as good as rabbit run they are still all probably better than whatever else people are writing these days. so i guess that fucking sucks. all of the other writers i like are either dead or they only write a book like every ten years. which really pisses me off because seriously once you're written three or four books how hard can it really be? STOP SLACKING.

i feel like for some reason the only writers that put shit out regularly are writers that fucking suck. like chuck palahniuk, it seems like every time i go to borders that fucker has a new book, and i usually buy it, and they usually suck. fool me twice shame on me i guess. the last book i read by him was rant, and let me tell you it fucking sucked. i thought it was about a serial killer, but it turned out it was about time travel and magic, basically harry potter, if harry potter talked about pussy more. GAY. it was also written from the points of view of like 70 different people, except i guess nobody told chuck palahniuk that he is a shit writer and doesn't know how to use more than one narrative voice. something else that nobody ever told him is that most of the people who read his books are not smart enough to figure out how to pronounce his name, fuck even i have no idea how you pronounce that shit and i am basically a god damn genius. TIME TO GET A PEN NAME.

i am reading a book of common prayer by joan didion right now, which is awesome, even though i usually try to avoid reading books with the word prayer in the title. too bad joan didion has only written FIVE BOOKS and she is probably going to die any day now, i mean seriously, look at her

anyway, john updike. i remember the first time i read the a&p, i guess this story is pretty much about nothing which is the best kind because then you can think about it however you like. what i thought about it was that life starts disappointing you when you are 14 and it never stops until you become a shell of a person. except it doesn't stop then either, you just don't notice anymore. which i guess is depressing except the other nice thing about stories about nothing is that everybody experiences nothing little boring situations every day, and if you think about them like a story they can all be beautiful. so thanks for that, mr. updike.
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