Monday, May 07, 2007

RepoSt ThiS oR nO cuTE BOyZ wilL <3 u 4 ONe YEar

i keep getting this myspace bulletin about DON'T PUMP GAS ON MAY 15 IN ONE DAY WE CAN KILL BIG OIL AND UNICORNS WILL ROAM FREE! FOR THE DAY! REPOST THIS IF YOU AGREE (AND I DON'T KNOW HOW YOU COULDN'T)!

uh what the fuck is that last part, i hate that part. YOUR PSYCHOLOGICAL WARFARE DOES NOT WORK ON ME.

anyway i do not agree and that is because i'm not a fucking idiot. i mean seriously this is the stupidest thing i have ever heard because it pretty much relies on the assumption that everybody fills up their tank daily. I REGRET TO INFORM YOU THAT PEOPLE DO NOT ACTUALLY DO THAT. are people that stupid that they think that if everyone fills up their car on the 13th or the 17th instead of the 15th it is going to matter? yes. people are actually that stupid. and apparently these stupid people are my myspace friends.

i used to work at a gas station i was working on 9/11 and there were lines of idiots around the block and people were beating each other in the parking lot it was awesome and the newspaper came and they interviewed me and i told them all of our customers were fucking idiots and they quoted me and then we ran out of gas and i got to have people death threaten me for the rest of the day. and then i worked the next day and nobody came in i am not even kidding the whole day ONE PERSON came in and filled up his car and i was like WOAH YOU DIDN'T FILL UP YOUR CAR YESTERDAY LIKE EVERYONE ELSE IN THE FREE WORLD and he was like NO BECAUSE I'M NOT RETARDED. anyway i bet on 9/12 there were probably only like 300 gas station purchases nation wide and i guess that didn't topple the oil industry so you might as well pump all the gas you want on may 15th.

i am not going to pump gas on may 15th because i only drive my car like 10 times a year because any kind of traffic makes me suffer acute myocardial infarctions. if you really care about stupid oil or the stupid environment you should probably just not drive but don't sell your car because then whoever you sell it to is going to buy gasoline and ruin the environment instead of you. you have to smash up your car, sorry. or you can go to citgo instead because it is venezualen and the sole shareholder is hugo chavez and he hates george bush more than you do and also i'm pretty sure citgo donates gas to poor people too so they don't freeze to death, if you care about that kind of stuff.

i don't actually care about anything unless it directly effects me in the short term but i guess i am probably a humanitarian for writing this all down.
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