Sunday, March 25, 2007

what's it going to be then eh?

sabrina says there are book people and there are movie people. i guess i am a book person because i think movies are pretty much stupid i mean reading a book is like watching a movie in your head right so i guess movies are the version for people that don't have an imagination. or the gift of literacy.

not really any cooler looking than whatever i imagined in my own head when i read the book.

i mean i watch movies all the time. usually when i am so hungover i can't really do anything else besides sit in front of i don't know probably the shining breathing through my mouth and thinking GOD THAT'S PRETTY. even though i really really love the shining enough to watch it twice every time i am too drunk to sleep i kind of hate kubrick because he made a clockwork orange and i fucking hate that movie and i hate people that like that movie and that is pretty much all people in the universe. i feel like that movie is one of those movies where if you asked someone what their favorite movies were they would probably say it even if they never saw it. like when you ask people what their favorite book is and they already looked at your bookshelf and realize that you are way smarter than them so they say 1984 or something but then when you try discussing it with them it turns out they read it in high school and they don't actually remember it and then you start grasping for ways to get this person out of your house. that is what a clockwork orange is like everybody likes it and nobody knows why and i bet you it's like the most mentioned movie in myspace profiles or something.

thank god you died so i don't have to find out how it could be possible for a movie to be even stupider than eyes wide shut.

i do not like a clockwork orange and i actually know why i do not like it i do not like it because i am a book person and i like books and that movie totally slaughtered the book. good job stanley kubrick you successfully desecrated a really fine peice of literature good for you. anyway the real version of the book has 21 chapters except the 21st chapter is missing in the american version of the book because i guess the publisher thought the ending was a cop out or something okay i will just tell you what happens in the end because you are never going to read it anyway alex rehabilitates himself. get it because human beings aren't clockwork oranges after all. and it's inappropriate to apply mechanical principles to human beings who are complex and are like an orange becaue they are capable of sweetness, duh. anyway the point is if i wrote a book about my ultimate faith in the goodness of humanity and then someone came along and turned it into that fucking movie, like if i methodically comprised my book of three sections and 21 chapters for a very specific reason related to the fucking theme or whatever and i titled it meaningfully i would be so super pissed if some fat bearded fuck came and used my words to make a movie of the same title that said like exactly the opposite of what i was trying to say. man if i was anthony burgess i totally would have shot stanley kubrick in the face by now.

what did the five fingers say to the face? slap! i'm anthony burgess, bitch!
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