Tuesday, May 02, 2006

uhaul time machine home hobos

driving in a uhaul everything feels like a country road because even though the thing is like a colassol steel rhino-bot it is like the princess and the pea where every time you go over a cigarette butt in the road the whole thing starts shaking like it's about to fall to peices. also the radio never comes like all the way in so the whole time you're waiting for the shadow to come on or something. THE SHADOW KNOWS. you can go back in time all the way to when it was cool to drink out of your flask while driving because duh you're in a uhaul time machine anything goes until the fine young cannibals comes on and you're like shit we are in at least 1987 WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. driving in a uhaul everything is hilarious. despite the vauge sensation that you are about to die. because of it. next time i get in a uhaul i probably should not get out of it. i am going to buy six uhauls and make impromptu parking lot zoos. i will put some driftwood in there and a bowl of water and some meat and fill them with vagrants. ERIN'S FAMOUS TRAVELING PEOPLE ZOO. everybody will want to come to my zoo except they will never know where it is going to be that is called scarcity and that is what i am going to use to make people be all up on my traveling people zoo's dick. also the media will be all hating on me like that is not art that is slavery what a DISGRACE!!! and then everyone will want to come see it so they can talk about it. like that painting of the virgin mary made out of cow dung. and i know some retard is going to be like wow this is a real social commentary for our times TRUE GENIUS! god i really do have all the best ideas.
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