Friday, September 23, 2005

but what about richard speck?

i went to some fucking crepe place and got a giant crepe and then i went to some shitty bar that jeffrey dahmer and john wayne gacy used to hang out at. JEFFERY DAHMER AND JOHN WAYNE GACY. me and jason sat on some barstools under a dirty blue light and pretended we were killers. and i drank four pabst blue ribbons.

jason went to the bathroom and some guy was jerking off in there and he like leaned back from the urinal so jason could see it. it was NOT HOT. or so i heard. during that time some kid came up to me and said hi or whatever and i said did you know jeffery dahmer used to sit on this very barstool? anyway i guess this kid goes to film school at columbia and he had a class with this guy who was dating a friend of a friend who i was in his film and i had to wear plastic gloves and put lipstick on my friend and then i had like a super exasperated monolouge or whatever. wow i met a kid at a bar who saw me in my friends friends friends movie. shit it's like i'm famous. anyway this kid is making a movie too because isn't everybody making a movie? anyway i get to be in it if i want but i only want to be in it if i get to act crazy because last time my friend got to act crazy and all i got to act was irritated while she got to smear lipstick all over her face and stare into space like an idiot. it was all very whatever happened to baby jane and i was JEALOUS. so i guess i'm going to be in this kids movie but only if i get to be insane in it.

jason is having a pussmitzvah party and he made the awesomest ever flier for it with some black iris georgia okeefe vagina thing on it with our lady of guadalupe shooting out of it. it is fantastic. we are also forming a fake country band called ai oh squares and we're making a flier for it with squares on it and shit and we're going to post them all over campus.

me and jason have special love for each other.

in order to hang out we had to pretend we weren't hanging out and then make plans with secret sign language so every idiot in the room wouldn't be like SHIT YES YOU ARE GOING TO A BAR THAT WAS FREQUENTED BY JEFFEREY DAHMER AND JOHN WAYNE GACY??? because you know they all would have been like that. i especially didn't want mike to come because i think in class today he might have said something about hating black people and i might have said whatever TRUST FUND.

i must have been pretty drunk last night because i threw my fucking pants i wear to work on the floor and now they have dog hair all over them and also i stole toilet paper from the bar.
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