Saturday, April 02, 2005

what's red and orange and looks good on hippies?


one time i came home from turkey and there was a fucking hippie living on my couch. then he left and then he came back with another hippie, a fat one named sluggo. when they came back they brought a bunch of powder and then they poured all the powder into gel caps and then the gel caps got wet or something so they had to lay them all over our house to dry. like i came home from class one day and there were fucking pills all over every surface in the house. i'm not even exaggerating, like i would open a cabinet and there would be pills all lined up on the shelf. i'm like great, i'm totally going to jail. then i ate one and i was awake for like three days and i wanted to die.

i fucking hate hippies. i really thought i was going to have to shoot sluggo. even though hippies are supposed to be pacifists or something i'm pretty sure he wanted to rape me. it's really cool having a fucking hippie that wants to rape you living on your couch. awesome in fact. sluggo had a taser too. too bad what sluggo didn't know is that i had a gun hiding in my ceiling and i fully intended to shoot him in the face if he ever tried to taser and rape me.

i never had to shoot him though because one time he pushed me and miette went crazy and attacked him.

i really used to associate with pretty much the classiest people ever.

never trust a hippie.
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