Monday, February 14, 2005

i went to a valentines day party this weekend and i ate too much guacamole and grossly compelling orange nacho cheez and i also drank to much vodka, oh and i also ate too much candy. i made valentines that said happy vd and had pictures of venereal diseases on them, the best being either this black guys dick that was really dark but really red and infected at the same time and had things coming off the head that looked like teeth or this vagina that looked burnt and also had a gigantic blister on it. they were also made out of felt and had beads and lace on them and shit, so at first you probably thought it was going to be some nice valentine and then suddenly you realized you are looking at a big infected gash. yay.

a guy in a pin striped suit told me i was old. i was like who are you calling old, you smell like a grandpa and you have wrinkles, you look older than me. he thought i said i was old first and he was just agreeing but what i actually said is i feel like a real old person which means that i am tired because i have a busy life, duh.

i got five valentines, one of which had kristie alley on it and said "look who's talking FATSO" and one that said "love 2005 style." i need to ask mandy to give me a new valentine because hers were pretty and fuzzy and i was all excited about it and then i got drunk and lost it. plus janine made cds with pretty cases and the song list had pictures of cabbage patch kids on it.

i also wore a skirt for the first time since 1996 and i'm wearing it again today and it was the talk of the clinical program, how fantastic my skirt is i guess because when i was walking past all the clinical kids in the hall dan goes all the clinical girls really like your skirt. today i am the coolest kid in school.
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